Connect with us

Live Better

Understanding financial infidelity and its effect on relationships

Published

on

(Family Features) Infidelity and deception can take many forms in a relationship, including some that have nothing to do with romance at all. One example is financial infidelity, where deceptions are reported in nearly half of relationships where finances are combined.

Among people who have combined finances with a partner, 2 in 5 (43%) confessed to committing an act of financial deception in a current or past relationship, according to a survey conducted by the National Endowment for Financial Education (NEFE). What’s more, 85% of those who reported a financial deception acknowledged the indiscretion affected the relationship in some way.

“When you comingle finances in a relationship, you’re consenting to cooperation and transparency in your money management,” said Billy Hensley, Ph.D., president and CEO of NEFE. “Regardless of the severity of the act, financial deception can cause tremendous strain on couples – it leads to arguments, a breakdown of trust and, in some cases, separation or even divorce.”

Understanding Financial Infidelity

Financial infidelity is an act of deception by one partner in a relationship where finances are combined. Examples include hiding purchases, money or accounts, or lying about the amount of income earned and debt owed.

More than one-third (39%) of U.S. adults who have combined finances in a current or past relationship admitted to hiding a purchase, bank account, statement, bill or cash from their partner, and about 1 in 5 (21%) admitted to lying to a partner or spouse about finances, the amount of debt they owe or the amount of money they earn.

Reasons for Financial Deception

A lack of communication and conflicting life or financial values may often be the root causes of financial deception, but U.S. adults also revealed other reasons for deceit with money. More than one-third (38%) said even though they are in a committed relationship, they believe some aspects of their finances should remain private. Meanwhile, another 33% were embarrassed or fearful about their finances and didn’t want their partner to know.

Fear of disapproval by a partner is also a powerful force, regardless of whether financial discussions are happening in the relationship. For example, 34% of U.S. adults who admitted to financial deception in a relationship with combined finances said they feared disapproval by their partner given discussions of finances had already occurred while 27% feared disapproval by a partner in a relationship where discussions about finances had not yet occurred.

How Financial Deception Affects Couples

Like other forms of infidelity, financial cheating can wreak havoc on a relationship, including arguments, loss of trust, less privacy, separating combined finances and even divorce. However, those who have been there offered some insight into positive repercussions, too, such as growing closer together and learning to communicate proactively.

Signs of Financial Infidelity

You may discover your partner is cheating financially when you come across a receipt or piece of paper indicating a purchase you don’t recognize or find your partner defensive or withdrawn in conversations about money. A deceptive partner may attempt to intercept bills via mail or email before you see them or remove the itemization of purchases on bills.

Learn more and find the full poll on financial deception at nefe.org.

Coming Clean

How to recover from financial deception

Whether you’ve caught your partner cheating when it comes to money, or you’re the one in the spotlight after making some financial transgressions, there are some steps you can take together to rebuild trust.

1. Be realistic in your expectations. Understand successfully rebuilding trust will take time, sustained transparency and commitment to shared goals and increased communication.

2. Commit to open communication. While the conversations may be stressful, the key is to focus on understanding why the financial deception occurred and what you can do, together, moving forward.

“When 2 in 5 people admit to committing financial deception in a relationship where money is combined, it highlights the need for greater communication and a deeper understanding of who your partner is financially,” Hensley said.

3. Create goals and ground rules together. Finding areas of compromise can help you get on the path toward rebuilding trust. That might mean having separate personal accounts while maintaining a joint account for household expenses, or you might create separate accounts completely with each of you paying an equitable share of household expenses.

You could also establish guidelines you can both abide by, such as agreeing that neither will make a large purchase, such as items over $100, without discussing it together.

Photos courtesy of Getty Images


SOURCE:
National Endowment for Financial Education

Continue Reading

Live Better

Meet a colorful new Supertunia

Published

on

In This week’s Home and Garden page, The Garden Guy Norman Winter introduces us to an award-winning Supertunia with bright yellow color. Also read about New Year resolutions for your yard.

Supertunia Mini Vista Yellow annual of year

As we headed into December we start to glance to the future, to the award-winning flowers for 2025. This is always a terrific choice for your garden dollar, whether you are looking toward the landscape, porch, patio or deck.
One such award winner is Supertunia Mini Vista Yellow, Proven Winners 2025 Annual of the Year.

Continue Reading

Live Better

On the Table focuses on proteins

Published

on

In “ON THE TABLE” this week read how to pack flavorful protein into snacks and the Dos and Don’ts of canned food.

Pack more protein in your lunch

As 2025 begins families are looking for healthier alternatives for certain foods and ways to pack more protein in their diet. Chicken of the Sea offers these yummy ideas for a snack.
Living a happier, healthier life often begins in the kitchen. From lunches on the go to sit-down family meals, keeping flavor at the center of your meal planning is key to maintaining healthy habits.
Based on Mintel’s 2025 Global Food and Drink Trends, experts predict that sweet, sour, smoky and spicy flavors will continue to rise in popularity among families in the United States this year. Show your family how much you care with delicious and nutritious dishes that don’t skimp on flavor. After all, it’s easier to stick to healthy eating when you find joy in the foods you share.

Continue Reading

Live Better

Navigating changes as a family

Published

on

(Family Features) Every family experiences changes. Some are planned, others are unexpected. Some are joyful, others are marked by pain or uncertainty.

Whether it’s divorce, the death of a loved one, welcoming a new sibling or moving to a new home, these events impact every member of the family. For young children, even small changes can feel monumental, and how adults talk with them affects how they respond and cope.

Dr. Lauren Loquasto, senior vice president and chief academic officer at The Goddard School, shares this guidance to help families navigate change.

Why Transitions Matter to Young Children
To understand why transitions affect children so deeply, it’s important to remember children see the world differently than adults. Their routines, relationships and surroundings establish a sense of security and safety. Their families and role within them form their initial identities. Any disruption, big or small, can shake their foundation. Children can handle change, but adults must help them process it.

Children are naturally perceptive. When something changes, they notice. When they lack the language or understanding to ask questions, they express their feelings through behavior. It’s how young children express, “I’m feeling something, but I don’t have the words for it.”

When children become clingier after a new sibling is born or struggle with meltdowns in a new classroom, they’re trying to process the changes in their lives. These behaviors signal, “I’m not sure what to do with all these feelings.”

View Changes Through Children’s Eyes
Everyone experiences changes differently. Even within the same family, adults and children may perceive and respond to the same event in unique ways. An adult may see moving to a new home as an exciting fresh start while children may see it as leaving behind the only bedroom they’ve ever known.

Approaching changes through a child’s lens helps reframe what’s happening. Instead of minimizing feelings, adults can acknowledge the shift children are experiencing and guide them with care.

Proactively Communicate
When families face big changes, one of the most common questions is, “What do we tell the kids?” There’s often a struggle between wanting to protect children from overwhelming emotions and offering them enough information to make sense of what’s going on.

Rather than avoiding the conversation, discuss what’s happening using this framework:

  1. Acknowledge what’s happening. Use clear, simple language, such as: “Daddy is moving to a different house and you’ll have two homes now.”
  2. Focus on the present or immediate future. Young children often don’t have a solid grasp of time. While they can understand routines and orders of events, it takes well into elementary school for them to truly conceptualize time.
  3. Name the feelings. Give children words for what they might be feeling. “It’s OK to feel sad or confused right now. Sometimes changes feel hard.”
  4. Provide reassurance. Let them know that even though things are changing, they’re still safe and loved.
  5. Encourage questions. If you don’t have an answer, it’s OK to say, “I’m not sure, but I’ll find out,” or “We’re figuring this out together.”

Avoidance is a natural instinct, but silence leaves children to fill in the gaps with their imaginations, which can be scarier than reality. Moreover, when they sense something is different but no one is talking about it, children might feel alone in their confusion. By proactively communicating, you tell them, “I’m here with you.”

Embrace Feelings
Transitions can be emotional and children need space to express their feelings without judgment. When a child cries or lashes out, instead of responding with, “Don’t be sad,” validate the experience by saying, “I see you have big feelings right now. I’m here with you.”  Help your child manage these feelings by encouraging active expressions, such as drawing, writing or moving to music.

Transitions can be challenging, but they’re also opportunities to build resilience and deeper connections. Approaching big changes with empathy, proactive communication and an open heart helps children feel more secure and confident to move forward.

To watch a webinar featuring Loquasto sharing additional guidance and access parenting insights and resources, visit the Parent Resource Center at GoddardSchool.com.

Photos courtesy of Shutterstock


SOURCE:
The Goddard School

Continue Reading
Ad
Ad
Ad
Ad
Ad
Ad

Trending